Richard Tocci

Richard Tocci
Just when you thought it was safe, I show up...


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Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Christmas and Rudeness

I was in Target in Bryan a few days ago, doing some sort-of last minutes shopping. The store was not especially busy, but there were quite a few people at the registers, which were moving traffic pretty well. My friend Jeff and I had just picked up a few items and headed to the front.

As I guided my red Target buggy to the registers to buy Hayden an alphabet toy that lights up, sings, dances (depending on its position on the floor), and generally tries to override the football game, I was directed to Register 10 by the wonderful traffic cop in the red shirt and khaki pants.

I really don't remember which register number it was -- go with me here, OK?

I came in behind a family that was discussing some subject of major importance to them, and to them alone. They appeared oblivious to their surroundings, including the 17000 people around them, and decided that, at the time I was approaching the register, the father needed to place their red Target buggy off behind them, which turned out to be directly in front of me. Not only did he cut me off from my designated register -- the register at which he was standing and purchasing his Jackass pants and Idiot books -- but the woman beside me, in another line, had her cart completely cutoff, at the same time, by the same cart.

You've seen my picture -- I'm not a small man. I'm larger than some football players, especially fullbacks. This guy had the nerve to inconvenience not one, but two people in an attempt to convenience himself. I never met this man in my life, and here he was treating me, and others, as if he was God's gift to the checkout line and red Target buggies.

I stared at the man for a full minute, and he didn't budge. He didn't notice I could not move at all from my location without pissing off several other people. The woman whose cart was cutoff wound up having to piss off people to her left and barrel her way through the next line of people to escape the Procession of the Jackass family.

Barreling through gave me a great idea...

I asked Jeff to hold the Alphabet Toy and his items, took my Little Red Buggy, pulled Jackass' Red Buggy, slammed them together, and walked forward toward the Jackass Family. About a foot away from Mother Jackass, I said "Excuse me!" as loud as I could, and they all jumped out of the way. Mother was shocked, Father appeared to be annoyed, which changed to "Oh Shit" when I shot him a look of disgust, and the kids, well, they took the hint and kept their mouths shut and their faces neutral.

On the way back, I shot the parents another look of "Piss off, you stupid bitches", paid for the Alphabet Toy, and left. Never had I run into such rudeness during the Holidays.

Be kind to people during this Holiday season. Please...

1 comment:

Unknown said...

On a brighter note, Hayden fully enjoyed his Alphabet Toy, and it was not nearly as annoying as I remember.